Old Man

If I were a man
I would want to grow old
I would wear funny pants
and play the trombone

I would drive a blue Buick
really slow down the street
and wear argyle socks
with brown shoes on my feet

I would smoke sweet tobacco
from an old dirty pipe
and keep my shoes on
until ten at night

And I’d bury my wife,
be widowed alone,
and build things of wood
for my lonely old home.