Saturday, December 16, 2006

A long time ago, I used to write poems

I never write poetry anymore.

Am I creatively dead?

Am I too structured?

Out of every hundred poems that I've written, maybe there are 3 that might be worth something. The only way to write good poems is to write a lot of bad ones, and I'm not even doing that anymore. I don't know why. I can't help thinking that my poetry is fueled by consumption of alcohol, but I know that's incredibly stupid, even though the idea looks plausible.

My life is boring and uncomplicated. In Milwaukee, there were complications. There were issues. There was drama. There were people.

I don't know what my point is.

Since I've lived here, I haven't been depressed for longer than a day at a time, which seems miraculous to me.

The truth is, depression can be creatively motivating. Emotional turmoil is something to respond to, something to interpret, something to write about. I'm not saying it's the only way to be creative, but it is the way I have the most experience with.

I really need to take an English class.

Life is good. Everything is fine.

And I feel extroardinarily dull.


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