Friday, September 09, 2005

free association

Don’t be afraid to be narrative
Don’t be afraid to tell a story with the poem
Tell the whole story
Stop leaving parts out
Stop assuming that the reader will assume
They won’t
I pushed my finger into the desk with it’s broken tip
The agony is numbed by my drunkenness
And apparently, I have a cigarette, already lit
Like a smoker or an addict
How funny that I can be normal all week long and be an addict for one night only
I like to be lonely
I like to be alone
My cell phone serves as a book of numbers that I call from home
I know a weird poetry instructor isn’t original
But I swear he’s like nothing I’ve seen before
And I’ve seen weird
Weird is a stupid word
It differentiates only from normal without specifying anything unique
Nothing that is weird is ever like something else that is weird
How can we categorize them as one?
In Canada they say that poets turn to fiction to make a living.
Firer says that a person equally known for fiction and poetry is rare.
It’s usually one or the other.
Poetry consumes.
And the crazy andy political warhol poet says that to truly write a poem, one must be like Whitman, amongst the grass, with nothing but time and space to think in, and those who live the life of daily drab and jobs and scrambling place to place may try to write poetry on the side, but what is the point?
All of this is emotionalized.
It wasn’t what was said, but what I heard.
What I heard is that if I am a poet, why bother being anything else when I should devote all of my energy to defining my true talent?
I hear my dad in my head, telling me to be somebody, to make a living, and I fear my own ambition in poetry I’m afraid that it will leave me poor and empty.
But with poetry I could never be empty.
I could live on the streets.
I could live on my own energy.
I could live on the mere essence of being me, If only, I could always write poetry
in it’s splendid delightful periphery


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